Saturday, April 4, 2009

Was JarHead made BY a JarHead?

It's been a few days since I've seen a really awful movie, but i found one! Well, it was a nice quiet evening and i felt like watching some intense war-action movie, so i got JarHead. It was about US marines in Kuwait during Desert Storm. It seemed pretty interesting at first, because i like guns and violence, but then its true colors started to show.
The first thing i must say about this movie was that it was IMMENSELY boring. During the entire movie, there might have been like 10 shots fired in all the action scenes. The director was obviously trying to make it some epic saga movie that showed a true "warrior's" life. For 2 and 1/2 hours, i watched soldiers patrolling around, cleaning bathrooms, and some other suggestive activities. It seemed almost to be a documentary....and i hate documentaries....I had originally expected the movie to be some US army propaganda, but it was not....which was the bad thing because government-payed movies are always better. The acting was mediocre, but there are many parts that go too fast to understand. At one moment this guy is cleaning his gun with a comrade, then the next thing you know he's about to shoot him.
The storyline was also trash. I mean, there really wasn't one. It was just him and his buddies walking around the middle east like headless chickens. Plus, you could tell most of the scenes were drawn. I don't know if this movie had some hidden semi-metaphorical message that i have yet to decipher, if it's just a movie for old war veterans, or if it's just bad. Why would you make a non-peace promoting war movie that has no violence in it? That is just a recipe for phailure. Plus, i couldn't stand the main character. I forget what actor played him, but man was he UGLY! And his stupid, monotonous voice really pissed me off.
So, i've ruled out it's not a documentary, it's not an anti-war movie (maybe a bit), and it's obviously not action.....so what is it?
BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD

2 comments:

  1. i just watched it, my god what a horrible piece of shit movie. it is a drama with yuppie football fans

    ReplyDelete
  2. Piece of Shit movie!!! Pointless ducking pointless

    ReplyDelete